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What happened to Christmas?

It's been months since my last post... I feel like I have let my Blogger's Guild down - I'm sorry, girls. I'm really going to try to read your blogs regularly, as well as update mine on a more... regular basis.

I hope you have all had a Merry Christmas. Ours was, well, it was nice. To be honest though, something was missing and I can't exactly put my finger on it.

Growing up, Christmas for me was extravagant! Now that I have children of my own, I seem to be following in my parent's footsteps. I want Ethan & Titus to have everything; I want them to be blown away; I want them to feel that excitement that I always felt on Christmas morning. But to be really honest, Christmas has just become more commercial than anything else, in our home... and I am ashamed to say so. I have a knot in my stomach when I think about the past few weeks leading up to Christmas. I have been SO stressed out, staying up late and shopping almost every night until it's made me physically sick. Basically, I've been a wreck. And all for what?

I want our boys to have the toys that they like - sometimes I think I want it more than they do. I am certain that they would have been happy with just a few things, but every year I go overboard. The more toys they get; the more toys they want.

My boys are thankful when they receive gifts, but I can't help but sense this numbness come over them when they receive too many gifts... where they are not content anymore with what they have and want even more, or, they don't appreciate what they have anymore. What are we really teaching our children by giving them SO much?

Something is missing here - Christmas should not about getting stuff; it's really about so, so much more. I don't want to go through another meaningless Christmas. I want our Christmas's to be joyful and meaningful.

I need to think about this a little more...

Any thoughts? How do you balance the giving/getting?

Coconut Oil

HEALTH BENEFITS OF COCONUT OIL

Research and clinical observation have shown that medium-chain fatty acids, like those found in coconut oil, may provide a wide range of health benefits. Some of these are summarized below:

• Kills viruses that cause mononucleosis, influenza, hepatitis C, measles, herpes, AIDS and other illnesses
• Kills bacteria that cause pneumonia, earache, throat infections, dental cavities, food poisoning, urinary tract infections, meningitis, gonorrhea, and dozens of other diseases
• Kills fungi and yeast that cause candida, jock itch, ringworm, athlete’s foot, thrush, diaper rash and other infections
• Expels or kills parasites, lice, giardia, and other parasites
• Provides a nutritional source of quick energy
• Boosts energy and endurance enhancing physical and athletic performance
• Improves digestion and absorption of fat-soluble vitamins and amino acids
• Improves insulin secretion and utilization of blood glucose
• Relieves stress on pancreas and enzyme systems of the body
• Reduces symptoms associated with pancreatitis
• Helps relieve symptoms and reduce health risks associated with diabetes
• Reduces problems associated with malabsorption syndrome and cystic fibrosis
• Improves calcium and magnesium absorption and supports the development of strong bones and teeth
• Helps protect against osteoporosis
• Helps relieve symptoms of gallbladder disease
• Relieves symptoms associated with Crohn’s disease, ulcerative colitis, and stomach ulcers
• Relieves pain and irritation caused by hemorrhoids
• Reduces chronic inflammation
• Supports tissue healing and repair
• Supports and aids immune system function
• Helps protect the body from breast, colon, and other cancers
• Is heart healthy; does not increase blood cholesterol or platelet stickiness
• Helps prevent heart disease
• Helps prevent high blood pressure
• Helps prevent periodontal disease and tooth decay
• Functions as a protective antioxidant
• Helps to protect the body from harmful free-radicals that promote premature aging and degenerative disease
• Does not deplete the body’s antioxidant reserves like other oils do
• Improves utilization of essential fatty acids and protects them from oxidation
• Helps relieve symptoms associated with chronic fatigue syndrome
• Relieves symptoms associated with benign prostatic hyperplasia (prostate enlargement)
• Reduces epileptic seizures
• Helps protect against kidney disease and bladder infections
• Helps prevent liver disease
• Is lower in calories than all other fats
• Supports thyroid function
• Promotes loss of excess weight by increasing metabolic rate
• Is utilized by the body to produce energy in preference to being stored as body fat like other dietary fats
• Helps prevent obesity and overweight problems
• Applied topically helps to form a chemical barrier on the skin to ward off infection
• Reduces symptoms associated with psoriasis, eczema, and dermatitis
• Supports the natural chemical balance of the skin
• Softens skin and helps relieve dryness and flaking
• Prevents wrinkles, sagging skin, and age spots
• Promotes healthy-looking hair and complexion
• Provides protection from the damaging effects of ultraviolet radiation from the sun
• Controls dandruff
• Helps you look and feel younger
• Is resistant to oxidation, so has a long shelf life
• Does not form harmful by-products when heated to normal cooking temperatures like other vegetable oils to
• Has no harmful or discomforting side effects
• Is completely non-toxic to humans

Reference: "The Healing Miracles of Coconut Oil" by Bruce Fife, N.D.

"When someone hands you a lemon - make lemonade!"

Freshly squeezed lemon juice (not frozen or reconstituted) will rebuild the liver faster than any other known method.

The lemon is a cleansing agent with the following BUILDING factors and contains these ingredients:



CALCIUM strengthens the brain for clear thinking

CARBON acts as a motor stimulant

CHLORINE cleans blood plasma

HYDROGEN activates the sensory organs

IRON builds the red corpuscles to rapidly correct all forms of anemia

MAGNESIUM acts as a blood alkalizer

OXYGEN builds vitality

PHOSPHORUS knits bones, stimulates and builds the brain for clearer thinking

POTASSIUM strengthens and energizes the heart, stimulates and builds the kidneys and adrenals

SILICON aids the thyroid for deeper breathing

SODIUM encourages tissue building


In my previous post, I discussed how drinking DISTILLED WATER sucks out the overload of positive ions in our bodies. This is where LEMONS come in. Lemons rebuild the body. The distilled water sucks out the positive ions and the lemon-aid winds you back up.

There are a few important things to remember when drinking lemon-aid:

1. Drink no more than 4 ozs. per hour and not after 6 p.m., with a maximum of 30 oz (about 15 drinks) per day.
   
2. Always dilute at a ratio of 1 oz. lemon juice to 9 ozs. water.
3. Suggested use: 27 ozs. water with 3 ozs. fresh lemon juice.

I hesitate blogging on this because there are cautions to everything we do and just like anything else, we have to be careful even when consuming natural things. Too much of ANYTHING is not good; and distilled water and lemons are no acception. Many people drink distilled water all day without realizing that it's too much for our bodies to handle. I have gone on complete lemon-aid fasts drinking tons of lemon water all day. Again, it's too much.

Using distilled water and lemon-aid properly can do miracles in your body, but these numbers are very precise - our bodies cannot handle more than 4 ozs. of distilled water in any given half hour; drink no more than 4 ozs. per hour of lemon-aid.

My teacher has worked in numerous cancer clinics all around the world. This is how they treat these dying people while carefully monitoring their body chemistry - distilled water and lemon-aid (among other things).
If you have any questions at all on this or would like to know more, I would be happy to help in any way that I can. Doctor Marshall is always there to answer any questions that I have.

Distilled water

Theory of Ionization

When a thunderstorm comes in, it brings heavy air that is charged with positive ions. Lightning cuts through the positive ions and the air is immediately recharged with negative ions. After a storm passes, the air is light with negative ions.

Food nutrition is based on the Theory of Ionization. The negative ions in our bodies are the good guys. The positive ions in our bodies are the bad guys – the pains, poisons, toxins, disease, etc. EVERYTHING that goes wrong in the body is related to positive ions.

Distilled water is an empty water which has the innate capability of attracting to it the overload of positive ions in the human body. It will literally suck out the positive ions from our bodies. Distilled water will no longer be “distilled” if anything at all is added to it - even an ice cube from non-distilled water.

Distilled water should be used as a medicine only. One of the biggest mistakes that we make when drinking distilled water is that we drink it all the time and in large quantities. It is very important that we never drink more than 4 ounces in any given ½ hour – more than that will overwork the body. Pure distilled water should not be consumed after 5:30 p.m., so our bodies can rest, with a 60 ounce limit per day.

"Eat them alone or leave them alone."

Melons are very easy to digest. This is due to their high liquid content - they are all 90% or more water. So melons digest almost immediately. They require virtually no digestive action by the stomach and pass through the digestive system very quickly; however, this can only happen if the stomach is empty. If melon is eaten with other foods that require more complex digestive action in the stomach, it can no longer pass through quickly and gets "stuck". Even though the melon is already broken down sufficiently to pass quickly through the stomach, in effect, it gets trapped there as it must wait for the other foods to be properly digested. As the melon sits and waits in the stomach, it begins to ferment, leading to bloating, gas and other digestive issues.

Due to this fact, it is important to remember the following rule for all types of melons in order to promote healthy digestion:

"Eat them alone or leave them alone."

This does not mean that you need to be alone when you eat melons, he-hel!! What it does mean is that all types of melons should be eaten at least an hour away from any other food - including other fruits. It is acceptable to eat different types of melons together, as all melons digest very quickly.


Here are a few interesting facts about melons:

• eating nothing by watermelon one day per week is very beneficial for the kidneys and cases of water retention
• cantalope and watermelon are excellent sources of beta-carotene and Vitamin C
• watermelon is cooling and has a very high water content
  

Fruits & veggies anyone?

FRUITS cleanse the body. During the morning our energy is focused on elimination and fruit helps with that process. It is not recommended to eat fruit in the evening (after 8 pm). Separate fruits from vegetables by 1 hour (creates gas).

VEGETABLES supply the body with minerals, which is needed for tissue repair. This process occurs mainly while we are sleeping. Include veggies with your lunch, afternoon snacks and dinner.

Did you know that anything with seeds is botanically a fruit? Here is a list of fruits that can be mixed with vegetables:

• tomatoes
• squash
• pumpkin
• avacado
• coconut (in the nut family)
  
• pinneaple (because of the digestive enzymes)
  
• papaya
• lemons
• limes
  

I'm back & I've missed you...

I have been passionate about natural health and nutrition for as long as I can remember - more so a few years ago when I began having some problems with my health and digestive system. Since that time, I began to read everything that I could get my hands on that had to do with natural health. I dreamt of becoming a Natural Health Practitioner, a Fitness Instructor... of being so healthy and fit, and helping others to live healthy lives.

Earlier this year, I took my very first step towards this goal and I went back to school! The moment I signed up for my first class, those dreams became tangible. I am so, so excited!

The course I am taking now is one of many Nutrition courses in my program. I have been learning daily living tips to stay healthy, and the importance of correct body pH balance in maintaining health. I'm learning how to be in control of my own body. Every week I come home from school filled with excitement and newfound knowledge ! I just love it!!!

So anyway, I've been sharing some of the things that I've been learning with my family and some of my friends. A few of my girlfriends thought it would be interesting if I posted some of what I have been learning on my blog. So I am going to do just that. I hope you enjoy this information as much as I have.

The International Academy Health Education Centre is where I am taking my courses. If you are interested, click on the link below for more information on their courses and everything else they have to offer.

Loving Actions Speak Clearly

Walk in love's annointing today: be kind, joyful, peaceful, and stable. Let God love others through you.

That is the cry of my heart today.

Proud Mommy

John 3:16

"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life."

Here is a little video of Ethan & Ty reciting John 3:16.

Beautiful Mom....

Happy Birthday!

Mom, in so many ways I model my life after you. You are so beautiful. Thank you for demonstrating such love. Thank you for always being there for me; for all of your encouragement, your prayers, your blessings, your company, your wisdom, your absolute love. I couldn't ask for a better Mom. You are more than my mom... you are my friend.

I love you.

. . .

I always think of you when I read this scripture, Mom. You have held on to God's instructions at all cost and with all of your heart, and God's grace covers you. You are so noble, Mom. Bless you on your special day.

Proverbs 4

Listen, my sons, to a father's instruction;
pay attention and gain understanding.

I give you sound learning,
so do not forsake my teaching.

When I was a boy in my father's house,
still tender, and an only child of my mother,

he taught me and said,
"Lay hold of my words with all your heart;
keep my commands and you will live.

Get wisdom, get understanding;
do not forget my words or swerve from them.

Do not forsake wisdom, and she will protect you;
love her, and she will watch over you.

Wisdom is supreme; therefore get wisdom.
Though it cost all you have, get understanding.

Esteem her, and she will exalt you;
embrace her, and she will honor you.

She will set a garland of grace on your head
and present you with a crown of splendor."

Listen, my son, accept what I say,
and the years of your life will be many.

I guide you in the way of wisdom
and lead you along straight paths.

When you walk, your steps will not be hampered;
when you run, you will not stumble.

Hold on to instruction, do not let it go;
guard it well, for it is your life.

Do not set foot on the path of the wicked
or walk in the way of evil men.

Avoid it, do not travel on it;
turn from it and go on your way.

For they cannot sleep till they do evil;
they are robbed of slumber till they make someone fall.

They eat the bread of wickedness
and drink the wine of violence.

The path of the righteous is like the first gleam of dawn,
shining ever brighter till the full light of day.

But the way of the wicked is like deep darkness;
they do not know what makes them stumble.

My son, pay attention to what I say;
listen closely to my words.

Do not let them out of your sight,
keep them within your heart;

for they are life to those who find them
and health to a man's whole body.

Above all else, guard your heart,
for it is the wellspring of life.

Put away perversity from your mouth;
keep corrupt talk far from your lips.

Let your eyes look straight ahead,
fix your gaze directly before you.

Make level paths for your feet
and take only ways that are firm.

Do not swerve to the right or the left;
keep your foot from evil.

It's hump day & I'm in a funny mood!

This is a workout that my mom, my sister and I have been doing off and on for the past 8 years or so. It's called The Body Flex. I know it looks funny (no, hilarious!) and weird, but we love the way that it makes us feel. It actually works to make your tummy flatter and your body tighter... that's if you can get through the workout without laughing so much. I know you're all gonna think I'm crazy, but that's okay... I already know that I am, lol! This workout truly works, but don't take my word for it - try it for yourselves! Click here for more info: The Body Flex Workout

For our enjoyment, someone has added some sound effects to the second video! It's true, while doing these exercises you do let out a lot of air, lol, but it's not THAT bad! Ha-ha-ha!

Woohooooooooo!

This weekend I did something out of the norm. I went swimming. Okay, let me rephrase that - I went swimming in a bathing suit. I actually let people see me in a bathing suit and I didn't care what anyone thought. Not a big deal for some people, but it's a huge deal for me.

Aerie thought it would be fun to take the boys swimming on Saturday. I was like, "that's fine but I ain't going in." My comment didn't surprise him because that's what he has come to expect from me.

As the day went on I began thinking of the fun they would have. And then I realized that I'd be missing out, once again, on all of the fun & family time, and all because of my w-e-i-g-h-t; measuring myself according to what I weighed... how I thought I looked in my bathing suit. So I put my foot down and I litterally JUMPED IN! I refused to let my weight control my mood or my day! And I had the most fun time with my family!

...which brings me to another thought.

I was in the change room and I look up and this woman nearly runs me over. The thing is, she was completely NAKED!!! I am one of those women who prefer to dress and undress myself in private when I am in a public place. Maybe it was the way that I was brought up - not sure. I am always, hmmm, shocked when I see women get naked like that. It's confusing for me. I wonder WHY? Why don't they cover themselves? I'm actually more curious than anything. I mean, women of all shapes, sizes and races do it. Why, why, why?

If you are one of "those" women who are not discreet when they get changed in a public changeroom, I would LOVE to know why. Just why. That's all :)

Thank you God for my food

Understanding the science of why we overeat and what causes food addiction is all pretty amazing stuff. But I want to remind you today that nothing is too difficult for God. Nothing! All we have to do is ask. It's not as complicated as we sometimes make it out to be.

Maybe you notice this as well with you, but in my life, there is always this point that I get to where I feel like I've lost all control in a certain area. I feel a sense of hopelessness and desperation, and this fierce anger comes over me. This anger is directed at the sin in my life - the area that I have lost control over. I realize that I am weak, that not only do I know that I can't do it on my own, but I don't WANT to anymore. I feel completely helpless and so exhausted.

When I reach this point I know that I am on the verge of a breakthrough - of FREEDOM. This is when I cry out and pour my heart out before the Lord. When I am at the point where I know that I cannot take one more step on my own -- I turn to God, and I let him speak to me.

I've realized that weight is an idol to me.

When I am angry, I eat. When I am bored, I eat. When I am stressed out, I eat. When I am depressed, I eat. When I am happy, I eat. I have found a source of comfort from my food. I have this love-hate relationship with food; I love it because it tastes so good, but I hate it because it makes me bloated and fat. When my emotions are out of control, I do not go to God or read the Word - I eat because it is easier.

I feel great about myself when I fit into my clothes and I feel thin, but bad about myself when I feel fat. I am not spirit-led, my weight controls my moods and my life. I draw strength from my weight and not from God. My weight is an idol to me.

I've missed out on so many of God's blessings and opportunities all because of my weight. I can't count the number of times that I've stayed home from church on Sunday mornings because I think I am fat. Just recently we had a beautiful women's banquet at our church, and I chose not to go because I felt fat.

I want to encourage all of the women who can relate to what I am saying. If we repent, God WILL heal us. He will TEACH us how to eat again. God will teach us how to eat until we are satisfied, and not until we are engorged. Every time we sit down to eat, we should thank God for our food. Food is not the enemy, and it's not our satisfaction either. Food brings strength to our bodies. When we are worried, angry and depressed, we should worship God and draw our strength from Him - not from our food. When we are eating there is an inner voice inside each of us that tells us when we are satisfied. At that point we make our choice - do we keep eating because it tastes so, so good? Or do we put our forks down and know that we are satisfied - that we don't need to eat anymore.

I am determined and so excited to not eat simply because food tastes good, but to eat because I'm feeding myself. I desire to eat healthy because I want to take care of myself, but I don't want to eat healthy to lose weight. There is nothing wrong with enjoying food when you are celebrating - weddings, showers, parties. But choose to eat to celebrate... not celebrate eating.

Cravings that kill

Have you ever noticed how bananas and strawberries don't cause cravings? You never feel guilty about eating too many apples or carrots. Why ? Because natural foods balance the body and physical cravings are caused by biochemical imbalance. Caffeine, alcohol, nicotine, salt, saturated fat, refined sugars and starches cause cravings because they imbalance the body's chemistry.

Addictive substances cause the body to become dependent on an unnatural substance for homeostatic balance. Removing it will cause withdrawals. During a withdrawal, the addict suffers through the painful readjustment as the body cries out for the missing substance in a desperate attempt to maintain homeostasis (chemical balance). The body demands the very substance that caused the imbalance.

Eating natural foods allows the brain's chemistry to function normally. Natural foods assist homeostasis, supplying vitamins, minerals and enzymes to assist the body in maintaining balance. In a balanced state, hunger is in relation to the body's need for nutrition.

Eating processed foods create cravings for processed foods. When we eat chocolate, we crave more chocolate. Eating foods filled with sugar in return makes us crave sugar filled foods. Eating chips makes us crave that salt and fat. These artificial pleasures satisfy for moments, but in reality they are stealing valuable nutrition from our diets by feeding our bodies with empty calories.

In nature, foods that taste good are good for us. I was just reading something that I found really interesting. Sweetness is an indicator of calories. Saltiness is an indicator of mineral content. A bittersweet taste, like lemon, is a sign of cleansing acids and vitamins. We like foods with fats and oils because they supply calories and essential fatty acids. Natural oils and fats are high in calories and fat-soluble vitamins. Healthy food has a wholesome taste, a pleasure intended to reinforce healthy behaviour.

When coming off of a long fast, our bodies do not crave foods like refined sugars and processed foods - instead we desire to eat wholesome foods. It's amazing, isn't it!


Have you ever eaten a pomegranate before? Yum, they are my favourite fruit.

We are not alone

I have had a few e-mails of people telling me that they are also struggling with food addiction. This is really a very common thing that many women (& men) are just too embarrassed to talk about. It is difficult to talk about. In a way it's a little humiliating confessing to any addiction. To publicly confess that something has control and power over us makes us feel weak and vulnerable. You know? But there is power in talking about our struggles. And when we feel weak, it gives God the opportunity to be strong in our lives and it also gives us the opportunity to glean from other peoples' experiences.

I know that I am going to have complete freedom over this - I just know it. I also know that I won't be perfect - that I will probably stumble along the way. But that is okay. My mind is being renewed and I can feel God transforming it. I don't want to ever forget what God is doing right now.

My desire is for you to get freedom in this area as well. If you aren't ready to talk about your struggle with food, that is okay. But for those of you who would like to share but would rather people not know who you are, there is always the option to comment anonymously.

Love,
Tracy

Cleansing my thoughts

Phillipians 4:4 states
...Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable - if anything is excellent of praiseworthy - think about such things...and the God of peace will be with you.

If we consider the brain a computer, each of us has been inputting data and setting up programs since childhood. Every kind word, criticism, smile, and insult is data. A lot of that data was false. Through all of these years of corrupted data, we may have come to believe that we are fat, ugly, stupid, weak and useless. Those beliefs have predetermined our actions and have powerfully affected our thinking.

Although I have come a long way, the battle in my mind is still an area of struggle. But I am on my way to freedom :o) I am so aware of my thoughts now. Throughout my day I fill my imagination with uplifting and good thoughts and I try to thank God as often as I can.

Just a few days ago this thought came to me as clear as a bell, "you are worthless." The thought came from out of nowhere. Right away I said outloud, "I AM worth something!" I am doing this with everything. Like when I feel overwhelmed while I am taking care of the daycare, I just begin to tell the children how much I love them and how I love spending my days with them, how thankful I am to be home, how happy I am. When I am eating food that I know is good for me, I see it nourishing my body and filling me with life. When I catch a reflection of myself or glance down at the spare tire around my waist, and those "fat and ugly" thoughts come in, I refuse to entertain such lies! I tell myself that I am fearfully and wonderfully made and I love how God made me.

Doing this alone has been helping me tremendously and it has only been a few days. I know that God is renewing my mind. And I know that the more that I think good thoughts, the better I will feel and self-discipline with come naturally.

My war with food

I can honestly say that one of my greatest desires is to feel and be super healthy. Health is a huge passion of mine. So how is it possible that I eat so badly sometimes - so opposite of what I desire. Not many people know this, but I am a food addict. It's not an easy thing to admit, but it's the truth. The more that I try to not think about food, the more obsessed that I become. But I'm on a journey; I am on my way to freedom and this is the beginning - right here, right now.

In the past I have abstained from chocolate, sweets, plus all the things that I shouldn't be eating on a Candida diet, for weeks at a time. I would eat one cookie, and then relapse with a full fledged binge. No amount of sugar was safe for me. I hated myself for being so weak, but the cycle went on. I needed discipline. I have gone on numerous, lengthy juice fasts over the years. Most of the time I would fast after a lengthy binge where I had gained weight. I could not stand myself anymore, so I would fast. After my fast was over, I would eventually blow it and destroy all the benefits of the fast. Fasting had become like a drug to me - fasting was increasing my compulsiveness. I loved the freedom that I felt during a long fast, the feeling of being in total control. Victory tasted sweet, but it never lasted. Each time telling myself that this time I would practice self-control after breaking my fast.

It is my heart's desire to eat nutritiously and to be healthy. I gradually see the scale going up yet the binge goes on. I know that these foods are harmful and killing my immune system, yet even the fact that I am jeopardizing my health, is still not enough to stop me. What compels me to raid the refrigerator when I am not even hungry? Or eat four granola bars in a row? If we honestly evaluate our decisions and actions, we will face the sobering realization that our emotions are in the driver's seat. Feelings compel us to act. When they become uncontrollable, they are defined as compulsive, obsessive or addictive behaviour.

Here Are Some Signs of Compulsive Eating:

• Thinking about food a lot.
• Eating to relieve worry or stress.
• Continuing to eat even after feeling sick from eating too much.
• Becoming anxious while eating.
• Daydreaming or worrying while eating.
• Overeating.
• Eating too fast.
• Eating everything on the plate.
• Feeling guilty when you eat.
• Eating in secret.
• Unable to eat one cookie or any treats that you really like.
• Binging after a diet.
• Hunger makes you feel fearful and uncomfortable.

I answered YES to every single one of these.

Tomorrow I am going to talk about our distorted thinking and our negative emotions.

Back from my blog fast

It's been a while hasn't it! Judging from all of the comments that I've received, it's safe to say that you are interested in hearing about my computer fast.

One anonymous reader wrote this:

I'd love to hear about your week of fasting. What did you do with the extra time not blogging? Did fasting meet your expectations? Did you recieve any insights from God? I love your honesty in your January 28th blog. I can't speak for your other readers but this reader would love to hear all about it.

I spent a lot of time in the Word, cooking more, spending more time with my husband and kids, sleeping more, etc. Aerie really noticed the difference. Usually when he got home from work every day, I would sneak downstairs and get 30 minutes or so on the computer thinking he didn't notice I was gone or whatever.

The first couple of days were harder. I was so used to running up and down the stairs all throughout my days just to check my e-mail for two minutes. It's not that I would spend a tremendous amount of time on the computer, it's more that I was beginning to feel obssessed with checking it - I was thinking about it way too much. So, fasting my computer time definitely brought some balance back into my life. As we all know, too much of one thing is not good. I desperately needed to rebalance my priorities. I did miss the computer a lot. Because I don't talk on the phone much, I keep in touch with many of my friends through e-mail. That was very hard. I felt a little isolated from that part of my life during that week. Sometimes I felt like I was missing out, but I knew it was only for a season so I pushed through.

Did fasting meet my expectations? Well, the three major reasons why I went on this fast were to... 1) Balance my priorities 2) Food Addiction and binging 3) Anger. This fast definitely started something, but it's a work in progress. Throughout my fast I had been dwelling on scriptures about love. I have been searching myself and praying for God's guidance and clarity in these areas of my life. I am learning where my anger is rooted and where it comes from, but like I said - it's a work in progress. I am really excited because I know that what I am going through is going to bring about complete freedom. The battle is in my mind - my thoughts.

Our Valentine's Day date

We had been antipipating this evening for days. Ethan had a sore tummy before we left and was still sick with an awful cold, but he still wanted to go. So we did. As soon as we were seated, we exchanged gifts. This kept us pleasantly occupied until our food arrived.
Ethan and Titus couldn't wait to get some Bugs 'n Cheese at Boston Pizza; Ty was especially excited! When the meal finally arrived - Ty thought it was just the most amazing thing! He dug right in and didn't come up for air for quite a while :)


I had the most amazing time with my family. I love spending time with them. they are the best!

Happy Valentine's Day!

LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE...

What do you LOVE to do on Valentine's Day?

Shout out!

A special hello to these beautiful women: Ranelle S, Christine H, Sarah Mac...
What do these 3 women have in common one might ask? Well, all three read my blog...and all 3 DO NOT comment!!!!!!!!!!!!!

He-he-he! I dare you to comment! I double dare you to comment! Am I putting you on the spot? Who else can I add to this list?

:o)

Love you guys

7 days

I wanted to let you all know that I will be taking a break from my blog and e-mail for a week.

I love my e-mail and blogging so much that I almost feel like it's consuming me. I just need to take it out of my life for a little while and get some perspective on things.

I don't think there is anything wrong with spending time on the computer. In fact, I have built so many friendships through e-mail and I am so grateful for that. Lately though, I feel like certain areas of my life are falling to the wayside. Often I choose to sit at the computer when I know that I should be doing so many other things like; spending time with my children and husband, spending time in the word, getting to bed at a descent hour, starting supper earlier, exercising...and the list goes on. My life is out of balance and I don't like it.

I've decided to abstain from e-mail and blogging all day, but allow myself about 30 minutes to verify my e-mail every evening. I will not be blogging, reading blogs or commenting on blogs during this time.

During this time of fasting, I also want to concentrate on the many areas in my life that need healing.

1) My struggle with food and binging

2) Anger.
I so desperately need God's love to infiltrate every area of my life. I take life a little too seriously sometimes, but...it's more than that. I want to love. I want to be loving and kind. Loving my children is so easy. Loving my husband is easy too, but I sometimes take my anger or frustrations out on him. Loving my daycare kids as I love my own children is a challenge. It's very hard. I'm not sure how or when this has happened but I feel as though my heart has hardened and it's just been more difficult to love lately. I want to love but, I don't know, I get moody and irritable -- often. I want a soft heart. I need more of God's love to work through all of me, and for this, I need to spend time with God. And ultimately I cannot do that if I am always on the computer.

So this is a good thing. I will miss my e-mail, blogging, responding to & reading all of your blogs and comments MORE than you can possibly know.

I'll be back on February 5th!

Love,
Tracy
. . .

1 Corinthians 13

LOVE

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

I'm it!

Lori recently tagged me on this little questionaire. Yeah Lori, that was very nice link love!
. . .

1. What’s the most fun work you’ve ever done, and why? (Two sentences max)

O.k. I have to say that it's what I did a few weeks ago. I (along with a friend) decorated the church for our Women's Night. It was time consuming, and I was a little nervous the entire day, but it was SO much fun! I love decorating!!!

2. Name one thing you did in the past that you no longer do but wish you did? (One sentence max)

Read novels and actual books - big, romantic, interesting ones that make me cry!!!!

3. Name one thing you’ve always wanted to do but keep putting it off? (One sentence max)

Organize all of my photos into a scrapbook.

4. What two things would you most like to learn or be better at, and why? (Two sentences max)

1)I would love to learn more about Holistic Health/Natural Medicine. The more that I learn, the more that I realize that there is SO much more to learn!

2)I wish I were better at teaching and expressing myself.

5. If you could take a class/workshop/apprentice from anyone in the world living or dead, who would it, be and what would you hope to learn? (Two more sentences, max)

I'm kind of rushing now, so I don't have time to look this all up.

1) I would love to sit down with Dr. Dobson from Focus on The family and just ask TONS of questions and learn as much as I can about raising BOYS!!!!!!!!

2)My dream is to return to school and become a Holistic Health Practitioner or a Nutritionist.

6. What three words might your best friends or family use to describe you?

Mischevious, Funny, Thoughtful

7. Now list two more words you wish they described you as…

Well spoken and Spontaneous

8. What are your top three passions? (can be current or past, work, hobbies, or causes– three sentences max)

1)Family & Friends. Just keeping close with the people that I love - whether that be through e-mail, get togethers, cards, phone...I just care so much about my family and friends and I always want to make sure that I make time for the people that I love.

2)Health and Nutrition. I am so passionate about learning as much as I possibly can absorb. I just love it all - ah!

3) Making cards: I love encouraging and loving people through cards.

9. Write–and answer–one more question that YOU would ask someone (with answer in three sentences max)

I don't know. Sorry! (Aerie is waiting to use the computer)

Tip

I felt and saw a cold sore just starting on my lip last night. It was at the stage where you can feel it and it's a little tingly. So right away I cut open a Vitamin E capsule and put some on my lips repeatedly through the evening and then finally went to sleep like that. I woke up this morning and it's GONE! I get cold sores every once in a while & Vitamin E always works for me (especially when you catch it right at the begining stages).

Just thought I would share my little Herpes tip with you all, he-he-he :o)

P.S. This is a photo taken of Aerie on our honeymoon vacation with a MASSIVE cold sore on his lip. It was a lot worse than it looks. Well, I guess you'd have to know what his lips look like without a cold sore.

I did it!!!!!

Last night was a very special night. I FINALLY did it! At 7:45 p.m., I crawled into bed and watched Grey's Anatomy from 8-9 p.m. But the great part of last night was that Aerie and I were both asleep by about 9:15 p.m. I got about 9.5 hours of sleep last night and I feel AMAZING today! I could totally get used to this. I would really like for this to become a regular thing.

Putting everything aside and getting to bed so early was very hard though, but well worth it. Do you ever feel sooooooooo tired that you actually get a headache? I took a power nap at the table while I was waiting for supper to cook...I was really tired.

Anyway, just thought I'd share that with you. Thanks for reading and have a great Friday and a wonderful weekend!

Love,
Trace
. . .
A note to the Blogger's Guild: I'm sorry that I haven't commented on your comments or on your posts these past few days. Hopefully, after a good night's rest last night, I will have the time this afternoon to spend blogging while the kids are all napping.

Are you proud of me Laura? I think this is my first time getting to sleep before 10:00 since we had our little agreement in November. Okay, three more times and we are going to Starbucks! Yahoooooo! Do you remember your comment? Have you been doing it too?

P.S: Laura, since you came up with the name and all...I think that you should totally post about the Blogger's Guild that we've started.

Happy Birthday Uncle Luka!!!

Just want to wish my brother in law, Luka, a VERY HAPPY BIRTHDAY today! We are thinking of you and wish we could be
there to celebrate with you.

We love you lots!

Aerie, Tracy, Ethan & Titus :o)

My home is your home

Do you keep a clean home? Are you a neat freak? Are you a slob? Is your home cluttered, messy, somewhere in between?
Have you ever wondered how people feel when they enter into your home? Welcomed, at home, uncomfortable, uneasy?

. . .

I love having people over - I LOVE it! I love hosting, feeding people, hanging out, and most of all - I love it when people feel at home in my home. I want them to feel relaxed and completely welcome.

I believe there are certain things that we can do to have a cozy feeling home. Atmosphere is a big one. I chose warm, neutral colours in my home, like browns, because they are easy on the eyes and create such a warm feeling - like a cup of hot coco or coffee. I love comfortable furniture, throws & pillows. And lighting...well we all know how candles, a toasty fireplace and dimmed lighting make us feel when we visit somewhere. It makes us feel relaxed and comfortable.

When I am expecting a visitor I clean like mad. Besides the basics like a swept floor, clean toilets and dusting, I tend to get right into those little areas - areas that people will probably not even look at...the closets, microwave, in between the stove and the counter (tons of crumbs), under the sink. By the time I am finished, my house is pretty well spotless. I feel good, satisfied and ready to have the visitors over. Now as people start coming in and making a mess, it honestly doesn't bother me. They saw my clean house and the rest is history. I do notice when things fall on the floor and get out of place, but it really doesn't bother me.

A friend and I were chatting about this whole clean house thing yesterday. She mentioned how one of her close friends always has people over at her place. Her house is always full and people always feel comfortable and welcome. My friend also mentioned that this friend of hers' home is not spotless - it's lived in and messy - a normal messy. I don't know what colour her walls are or whether or not she has candles lit for ambiance, but...I'm guessing not. When it all comes down to it, all those little things that make a warm atmosphere are great and may look nice, but that's all they are. They are not going to make people flock to your place. What I think WILL do that is a combination of many things. I think number one would be - YOU! What warm feelings do you give off? Are you friendly, kind, welcoming, inviting? Do you have snacks and food? What about your house? Is it so clean that people feel like they cannot take one step without feeling as though they messed something up? Do you give people "the eye" when they drop crumbs on the floor? Or do you glance down at the mess they just made?

I've been thinking and wondering about this. I wholeheartedly want people to feel so welcome and comfortable at my place, and I hope they do. But I don't know. I think that I need to lighten up on the cleaning. I don't want to be that person who scans the room for messes while people are chatting away at the table...or leans down to pick crumbs off the floor in the middle of conversation (which I did on Saturday!). I don't want people to feel like they have to apologize a million times for the mess they have left behind.

So this is what I'm gonna do. I'm going to have people over and keep it simple. My toilets will be clean, the floors swept up...well maybe...and well, I don't know. It won't be spotless. Ahhh, I am getting all anxious just thinking about that. I don't even know if I can do it.

Well, I will totally keep you posted. In the meantime, what are your thoughts on this whole subject? Do you think that people feel more comfortable in a clean home or a messy and lived in home? Do you think it even makes a difference? What else do you think make people feel comfortable in your own home?

You know what I think? I just realized something. No matter what your house looks like or how messy or tidy you keep it, if you are comfortable in your home - then everyone else will probably be too. You know? If your house is really piggy and you are totally okay with that and you're not apologizing every 2 minutes for the mess...then people will just be like, okay if she don't care, then why should I? O.k. I really have no idea. I probably should have thought this through a little more before posting my thoughts on this.

This is me thinking and processing.

Fun, Friends and Scattergories...(and cheating)

Last night we had some good friends over - Stuart, Sarah + kids, and Steve, Suzie + kids. We ordered pizza, drank tea (Oolong), talked and talked...and then we sat down to play Scattergories. Sarah played really well - she won! Way to go Sarah! Susie and I tied in bottom place :-(

Our plan yesterday was to go tobogganing together, but it was so cold so we decided to skip the outdoor fun and get together at our place. I must say that these two families are some of the kindest, most thoughtful and nicest families we know. They are a lot of fun and it's always a pleasure to spend time with them. Aerie and I are very blessed to have so many wonderful friends in our lives.

So anyway, back to that game! Ok, I did cheat a little. It wasn't so funny this time though. There are not a whole lot of subtle ways to cheat at this particular game - ESPECIALLY when everyone is watching you like a hawk! Twice during the game Susie had to tend to her children, so the game was put on pause. We paused the timer, closed our books and waited. A few times I took a quick peek inside my book when I thought nobody was looking, but Stuart saw me every single time. I wasn't doing very well, so I needed a little help! Scattergories is not my best game - I've never been great at it.

Anyway! Then the unthinkable happened. Someone rolled the letter "D" but for some reason I thought it was the letter "N". So I wrote my list of N words. I couldn't believe that! And needless to say, I wasn't happy. I knew the game was so over for me. I was in a bad mood after that which brings me to believe that I am a sore loser. I love to win, but I really hate losing; I can dish it out, but I can't take it. It's so true. I've never really been physically strong, but I am tough and I love to fight and start things that I can't finish but as soon as I get hurt - that's it for me. I get upset. What is up with that? Maybe I am still PMS'ing. He-he-he! Can't blame everything on that.

So anyhow, I don't really have a point here.

Oh! I do want to say something else that I just remembered! I need a vote on this one!!! These guys were trying to give me a "thumbs down" on a certain word that I wrote for a LEISURE ACTIVITY. I wrote that MOON WALKING was a leisure activity. Can you believe that they didn't think that moon walking could be a leisure activity??? I know how to moon walk, and I even told them sometimes I moon walk while I am watching TV - like to practice and stuff. I think it was a very creative answer! Maybe they were just upset that I had cheated and wanted to see me lose.

So I need some votes here! Moon walking = Leisure Activity - Thumbs up or thumbs down?

P.S: O.k. One more thing. The highlight of my evening was when we (I) tricked Stuart and put a hard boiled egg in his glass of milk, HEHEHEHEHE! He saw it though...well, the egg was still hot and pretty stinky, so his milk was lukewarm and kind of smelly. Oh that is so funny.

Without the kids

Aerie's mom (Nanny) offered to pick up the boys last night and take them to Cosmic Adventures. The kids always love spending time with their nanny, and Aerie and I got to go on a little date. We've been needing some time to talk so we went over to Starbucks and got ourselves a delicious tea. We both tried one that we haven't tried before, Green Tea - Ginger (highly recommend that one).

It was relaxing and nice to just hang out. We went over our agendas for the next two weeks, we chatted, talked about our lists of goals, and then...PLAYED SCRABBLE!

I started the game really believing that I would not cheat. I wanted to win fair and square. Well, sort of. I wanted to try anyway. While I was thinking of a word, Aerie saw Melissa and went over and said hello. The first thing she asked was "Is Tracy cheating over there?"

Aerie was gone for over 5 minutes and I could not find a word. Okay, let me rephrase that - I could find many words, but I could not find a GREAT word that was worth a lot of points. I was looking for the letter T. I reached in the bag, laughing to myself, and grabbed a few letters...NO "T"...ah! so then I saw Aerie walking back over and I just grabbed a handful of letters. The first thing he said was "You little stinker - you cheated didn't you!" I told him that I didn't (and he believed me). But then it was taking me sooooo long to find a great word so I dropped a hint and told him that I had too many letters to choose from. He didn't get the hint. Finally a few minutes later he glanced down at my box and saw that I had about 30 letters and he flipped out and said, "Game's over - I win!" He-he-he. But I actually won though because the letters that I used on the board were really all of my letters. I never actually used the big pile of letters that I sneaked. So I win, eh?

On our way out Aerie went over and said bye to Melissa and he told her that I cheated. She was the LAST person that I wanted him to tell. Read THIS and you will know why, he-he!

My odd, little quirks.

So I have been PMS'ing for a few days now and I've been really emotional and moody. I know...gross. This morning Aerie and I were talking on the phone and he was like, "Are you on your period or what???" I felt like talking about me. I had done this really stupid questionaire online and the results really put me in a wacko mood. Click here if you want to test yourself. So I started to ask Aerie tons of questions. He was getting a little irritated by my questions...I must admit that I was being a royal pain...but anyway, he wrote out what he said to me because I begged him to. My mind doesn't absorb what people tell me - I need to see it to remember it. So this is what he wrote:

.

Tracy,

You are a planner. But you don't work well under stress.
You are not spontaneous.
You can't work under pressure.
Everything needs to be "EXACTLY" the way you want - or its not going to work.
You focus on the minute insignificant details more than anything else.

You are wonderful at completing a task, but it takes you 5 times longer than any other person I know.
Your effort is always appreciated, but it is not always necessary.

For example - Why spend 10 minutes fixing the boys hair if you are just going to put a hat on their head?
You can't make a meal unless you know every detail of the recipe - no wingin' it.
You can't let someone in our home without it being "SPOTLESS".
You are almost always late because you can't leave the house unless you are immaculatly groomed.

There are positives and negatives to each of these quirks you have.
I think you need to learn to choose your battles.

You don't need to spend more than 5 minutes getting ready to go buy groceries.
You can fix kids hair when we get there.
People don't care if the floor is washed before they come over to visit.
Some of the best recipes in the world are made by wingin' it.

I love you.

.

Hmmm, I do believe that what he wrote was very true, but now I sort of wish I wouldn't have asked him to tell me. I would like to justify my bizarre behaviour by hearing all about your quirks.