A little while back I received an e-mail game from a friend where we are supposed to forward it to friends and describe them in one word. I love stuff like that, so I sent it to many friends. I love getting compliments and it's so neat to hear how others perceive you. Some of the different ways that my friends described me were: graceful, funny, caring, loving, quiet and gentle spirit, someone I can count on, beautiful, giving, sweet, quirky, kookie, dork (<- I think that one was a joke). Each of my friends described me differently. Then a strange thing happened. I got an e-mail from another friend who described me as "vague - as in reserved, unclear, confusing personality, hard to read...that kind of vague". I wrote her back right away and asked her if she was serious. I thought she was joking. She was serious. I wrote her back and told her that she makes me that way and that was pretty much how I would describe her too. We came to the conclusion that we are both like that with each other, but not like that with everyone. What I find so interesting, and the question that I would like an answer to is, why are we like that together? Why is it that I am easy going, relaxed and funny around people that have a good sense of humour and are relaxed? Why do reserved people make me feel uneasy? I think that I am shy with people that are more reserved because they are hard to read and you just never know what they are thinking. It's such an eye opener when someone tells you that you make them feel that way too - that you make people feel uneasy. When people are shy or quiet and don't use their words, the people around them have to rely on their body language. I guess sometimes my body language is unclear, reserved, hard to read...and maybe even confusing. So, what do I do with this now? How can I change? I want to be real with people and I want people to see me as who I am. But I would like to have the type of personality that makes people feel comfortable. I don't know if I ever will. Anyway, my friend went on to say "I guess I am only capable of being as open as the person I am talking to". I also feel like that sometimes.
Anyway, I would love to hear some input from people who do not struggle with this - from people who are open and not so reserved. Do you have any suggestions or stories to share? I would also love to hear some input from people are are reserved and quiet, hard to read - and hear what they think about all of this?
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8 comments:
DORK =
Delightful to talk to;
Outrageously nice;
Reasonably good-looking (haha);
Kind!
That better? ;-)
Hi Tracy,
You have so much life inside of you and it is great to read your blogs and to be a part of your life as well! Thanks for letting us more into your world Tracy! I love the site!!
I love the entry about quality time with your kids. It so true. Time really is the best gift. In the midst of laundry, work, diapers and chores, it was a good reminder to take time for what really counts:)
Sorry Tracy. The last comment was from me:)
Rhonda
Hey Trace...thanks for sending this to me. I would love to have a blog too...but time!!!!! If only there was more time. I love your blog. You are a great communicator with the written word.
I agree with Lori's comment about different people bringing out different aspects of ourselves and the deeper comment too.
I didn't reply to your personality game but the first word that popped to mind was; mischievous. ;
See you soon...lots of love...
Tracy,
I remember when I first met you, I saw your beauty on the outside. Once I got to know you through the women's lifegroup and mom's night outs, I was amazed to see the inner beauty you possess. It is so true what Lori said, if we want a relationship to grow deeper, we need to get deeper ourselves and let people get to know the real us. I love reading your blogs...keep them coming : )
Love,
Carrie
Hi Trace,
As you can see, I am reading your Blog. I have some catching up do and some commenting to do. I didn't realize my "one word" comment about you would cause you so much inner turmoil! I'm so sorry! You are so many things other than 'vague' and I don't think 'vague' was a good choice of word. I think you are beautiful inside & out, sexy, sulty, graceful, loyal, kind, loving, caring, giving, considerate, patient, down-to-earth (straight from Mars), funny, freaky, kookie, quirky, quacky.... OK, I'm out of breath.
The word I should have chosen for you, if I had thought it through, is 'mysterious' or even 'intriguing'. To be honest, I was captivated by your 'aura' from the very first time I saw you sitting at your desk at CSC, and I knew from that very moment that I wanted to know you! Even though we don't get to spend alot of time together, I want to continue to know you.
On that note, we should get together soon - how about next week. I will call you on the weekend. See you soon!
Isabelle
xo
Wow, thanks for the really nice compliments, Is. I think 'freaky' was a compliment, right, right? ...and that Mars comment too! He-he!! I find that we don't often get to see the "serious" sides of one another. Do you think? I'm still trying to really understand why I am more quiet with certain people but now that I am more aware of how I act, I feel like I can make some healthy changes. I don't know if that makes any sense. Probably not :) I find that you and I are some somewhat similar in a lot of ways - but oh so different in many other ways. I sometimes need loud or direct people to bring me out of my shell.
I can't remember which word I used to describe you - oh yeah, I think I said you were reserved, right? I do still see you as reserved, but I see so many other qualities in you as well. I think you are very smart and you articulate your words so well, you are really thoughtful, you have a great sense of humour which also makes you really fun to be around, you're kind, giving, honest, mysterious, dependable, always on time (he-he), and very beautiful.
When I first met you at CSC, we had something in common instantly - we were both pregnant for the first time, carrying baby boys. I liked you right away and I knew that you were someone I wanted to get to know. I was really excited when I met you and I'm really glad that we became friends. Believe it or not, you made going to work a lot of fun for me. All of our trips to Timmies, taking breaks and lunches together...and then when Ethan & Tristan were born, taking the bus to CSC while we were on Maternity Leave to show off our babies, and getting together for play dates. And it's true, we don't see each other very often anymore - but I just want you to know that you are a special friend to me and I always look forward to our yearly dinner and movie night! He-he, okay...it's more like twice a year! We are due for another one of those!!!
Love,
Trace
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